The Power of Now's Power Over Me
It's giving presence
If you’ve already read The Power of Now, fantastic. I am very new to smart books, as you will find out. For starters, I use the Books app that came with my iPhone to read. I have never met another person that did this, let alone an academic. So, please, have some space and grace for me.
I’m not a very present person. I pride myself on multitasking, which I’ve read is rotting our brain, but that high I get from “doing it all” is very real. I scroll on my phone while watching pretty much any TV show because I feel more relaxed that way. Honestly, the only stuff I don’t scroll through is TV that’s already so base, it can’t get any more numbing. I regularly refer to that show as the Best Show on Television. Probably because it takes me little effort to watch it. And at the end of a day, little effort is very soothing. If you have takes on that show, please send them along to me. I’m Team Whitney and I think Heather gave the black eye to herself.
I started reading The Power of Now because I had heard Eckhart Tolle interviewed on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday. (Oprah is top interviewer in my book. Remember that silent vs. silenced bit??? She is a magician of discourse) I heard the episodes during the pandemic, and remembered that everything Eckhart was saying really hit. But, when I look back at my journals during 2020, a knocked over garbage can “really hit,” so I had to go back and relisten. When the podcast episodes still hit 3 years later, I picked up the book.
I hate to say “life-changing,” but honestly, yeah. The tl;dr is (bold for someone to state who hasn’t fully r’d yet, but here goes) if you’re thinking about the past or future, you’re wasting time. All that matters is right now. If you’re always in the now, then you’ll always be at peace.
It’s made hanging out with me super cool, I’m sure, as I am constantly bringing this book up. Which I guess is presence? If I’m constantly talking about learning about being in the present, I’m present, right? Certainly something that Eckhart had to bank on as a byproduct of us living a more present life. Every time I talk about my newfound present lifestyle, I have to mention Eckhart by name, and I’m sure that’s tight for book sales. This is probably better than last year, when I had just discovered bell hooks (I know) and read The will to change: men, masculinity and love then gave it as a gift to men in my life. But, truly, every person should read that book. Especially the men who I personally know.
Anyway, back to my boi Eckhart: the first part of the book was hard for me. It says that the first step to becoming present (or “Being” as its referred to in the book) is to become “The Watcher” of your life. Watch yourself think and act, but don’t react, essentially. This is my default mind when I’m really stoned, and it’s very uncomfortable. It’s also how I ended up watching What Men Want and thinking it was a very deep movie. Because I was very high and very much “watching The Watcher” melt down at…Tracy Morgan..? Not sure. This was not a great way in for me.
However, as the book goes on, it continually highlights that your most joyous times were probably the moments you were most present. It also points out that your most creative times are derived from this as well.
“All true artists, whether they know it or not, create from a place of no-mind, from inner stillness.”
As this suggests, we’ve actually been “accidentally present” a lot in our lives, but we never clocked that those moments also happened to some of our best as well. It makes the whole idea of presence more accessible, because technically, you’ve been there before, you just might not know how to get there.
Another passage I highlighted in my Books app:
“The reason why some people love to engage in dangerous activities, such as mountain climbing, car racing, and so on, although they may not be aware of it, is that it forces them into the Now.”
It was interesting to me to see that all the things Free Solo Guy and I love to do are inadvertently trying to get us back to this point? This point that’s “free of time, free of problems, free of thinking, free of the burden of personality” as E writes. Burden of personality is so…apt. As someone who regularly networks, it is truly such a burden to have to trod out that personality/where you’ve been/what you’ve done charade. Networking has to be the opposite of presence. All you’re doing is digging up shit and presenting it to someone in hopes they like it enough to give you a job doing something that you think will finally give you purpose, but then you’ll feel disconnected yet again, and won’t want to identify with your job, but in our society, your job defines you…so you go and network and tell that same story all over again.
Very unpresent behavior.
Something I kept wondering about when I first started reading was “What if I don’t want to be present for this event lol?” Example below
I think, and IDK fully, because again, have not finished the book, but if you’re always present, you don’t dwell. Dwelling is one of my specialties. If my work only valued dwelling more, they’d see I am #1 employee.
I think, with presence, you can experience the sting or pain of something, but it doesn’t linger. It’s a moment, then you move to the next. The book has this very direct set of guidelines for painful moments:
“If you find your here and now intolerable, and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally.”
It’s quite simple when you think about it. Just because it’s a simple concept doesn’t mean it’s simple in execution. I think the one thing I resent about this book is that it makes it seem like once you’ve read it, you can become it. There’s even this line:
“One day, you may catch yourself smiling at the voice in your head, as you would the antics of a child. This means that you no longer take the content of your mind that seriously, as your sense of self does not depend on it.”
Not sure if that’s in the cards for me in the near future, but it’s a nice thing to think about, when I’m not thinking about the present moment, I guess.
Also, there’s some God-ish parts. There’s kind of an insidious push toward Christ, but then Eckhart backs off and is like “….or whoever you want…doesn’t have to be Christ! But…I’m definitely going to use the word Christ from here on out.” IDK. It’s a little off putting if you’re not into that sort of thing.
Like I said before, I personally I have a tough time getting present. The book introduces this technique that I think really tricks my brain in the best way possible.
‘Close your eyes and say to yourself ‘I wonder what my next thought will be.’ Then become very alert and wait for the next thought.”
I’ll be damned if that thought never comes. Pretty sneaky, presence.
As someone who is 75% through The Power of Now, I’d say I’m about 10% more present than I was before beginning the book. I still fucking love multitasking, and I am still dwelling. But, I have pretty severe anxiety, and this has helped tremendously in calming me down a bit.
I have to admit it still feels like such a cop out. Like if I’m not thinking about every little thing, I’m somehow cheating at life, which is super revealing. I have it in my head that if I’m not anxious, I’m not fully participating. That if life isn’t hard, I’m not playing it right. The toughest thing for me honestly has been to just let go and accept that when I’m actually present, things somehow find a natural calm. And that calm is actually the goal.
🎵 That’s the power of now! 🎵
(Sung to the tune of “The Power of Love”)
Stuff I’m v into this week:
PODCASTS
Death Sex & Money: Why the Creators of "Everything Everywhere All At Once" Treat Their Partnership Like a Marriage
Every interview from anyone involved with Everything Everywhere All At Once is such a dreamy listening experience because everyone who worked on that movie is so incredibly proud of it and grateful for it. Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert (aka Daniels, the directors & writers of the movie) were on one of my favorite podcasts talking about their partnership and how they’ve supported each other throughout the years. You can tell they love and know each other so well, and every failure and casual hang has led to this success. It’s a great listen, and also gave me the phrase “space and grace” that I used earlier
Talk Easy: The Road to Actor Ke Huy Quan’s Second Act
This interview tore my heart out in the best way. Ke Huy Quan’s journey to stardom is one that is, like the Daniels, full of passion and care in a way you don’t often hear about in Hollywood stories. I’ve gotten really into this podcast in the past year. Sam Fragoso’s exhaustive research of each of his interviewees is so refreshing. You get to hear real conversations that other podcasts simply don’t offer.
SONGS
There’s nothing to do here / But you can drink until you drown
Are you from a small town that you visit every once in awhile to remember why you left? Cool, same. You’ll like this. This is from my favorite genre of music right now, which is broadly indie, specifically women from small towns discussing drinking. Which leads me to another banger:
Ranch Water by Story Slaughter
Little me would’ve thought this place was a dream / But the hills don’t look like they do on screen
Sippin' on this ranch water at the bar alone / 'Cause it tastes like home
The flip side of being from a small town is seeing how easy it is to achieve the nuclear family, home ownership and small town notoriety if you stay in that town. This song glorifies it a bit too much for me now, but 24-year-old Sam would’ve had this on repeat. And honestly, so does 32-year-old Sam. It is just such a perfect folk-inspired song about setting out to prove your ready for the big time, but then missing the predictable rhythm of where you’re from. God, it’s a perfect song.
ALBUMS
Joni Mitchell - Blue
I know. I know. I know.
I’m doin’ a lil experiment where I listen to the top 50 albums according to this 2020 Rolling Stone list. For being pretty into music, I’ve only listened to a fraction of the classics. Hoping to change that this year.
Joni Mitchell was one of my mom’s favorite artists but she rarely played her when we were all around. Listening to the album, I understand why now. It’s really such a self-exploratory album and feels better to listen to when alone. It’s ripe with confessions and makes you feel the same.
Also, it’s only available on Apple Music because Joni pulled her albums from Spotify after hearing they wouldn’t pull Joe Rogan. P dope.